the space in which we find ourselves together, in which we encounter each other, react to one other, is of a specifically different kind, according to the other person and the relationship with them. the space of this relationship is not interchangeable with the relationship's space to someone else. it is about contact, and this touch lives and gives if it is felt and shaped as unique.

when we meet in person, we notice how our body behaves differently facing this person or that. what with one person may feel free and moved, gets with another person perhaps stiff or clumsy. so that the space itself feels different, between warm and cold, open and blocked, secure and subjected.

this unmistakability in body experience and space also reveals itself in speech. always different the tone, the rhythm, the way to express, and of course also the contents are different, depending on the relationship to the particular person.

and eventually this also appears in writing. also a letter takes on this specific tone, with expressions which we only use with this person, features terms and contents which only here we share. were i to show somebody a letter addressed personally to me, i would violate the space of this uniqueness and harm the trust of the sender to estimate this space and this uniqueness.

this harm has now become commonplace in digital media, and nobody even seems to notice it anymore. a message that comprises both business and personal matters, and is addressed to a museum director, is forwarded by him in full to his administration. an email to a friend, which meant him as addressee and was written to him in a specific tone, is forwarded by him without any changes to another friend because the message contains a suggestion which includes this other friend. a collegue forwards a request which was mixed with personal notes and questions, as is to her department.

usually the transformation from one space to another occurs through a particular formulation. frank suggests that ... is such a transformation because i describe with my own words what frank wrote to me in our own unique communication space.

the less specific and less strenuous act is to copy the relevant section of a message, in this case frank's suggestion, and insert it into my message to someone else. this takes just a few seconds, and would at the least separate the personal parts from the ones which are related to someone else.

instead the click on the forward button, and the harm is done. why harm, that's completely normal. no time. this is faster. simpler. everybody does this. my god what else should i pay attention to.

if this is an accurate example for the insensitive usage of digital media and their possibilities, it would mean that we are incapable of using these media in a way that garantees respect and practices sensitivity. instead, speed and simplicity are the most important qualities and become the new standard. this is, however, the opposite of culture, if culture means to care for something because there is a value to preserve. it has to do with time, with attention, with dedication.

turned into something positive this also means that a different behaviour would be possible. the email itself does not prevent own formulation or to copy a section rather than forwarding the whole message. it is not the medium itself which does something, but how we use it.