different kinds of being alone.

to feel oneself lost, abandoned in the unknown, miserable. separated from others, separated from the world. involuntarily, deprived. only hitting walls, but not able to really speak with someone. because there is no common understanding any more. also separated from oneself. in german, i feel good is expressed as i feel myself good [ich fühle mich gut] which has the literal meaning of a myself which is felt well by the i. without contact to this strange instance of self, life is twofold lonely, as without the others and without oneself.

this loneliness can only be productive if it is a temporary sentiment, perhaps induced by sturdy causes, a disappointment, a separation against own will, a rejection. in this case it is a shock which can lead again to search and find a relation to others and to oneself. if this state persists however, it becomes destructive.

there is another loneliness which experiences separation not as being abandoned, but as part of a movement. a movement of approaching and getting to distance. this loneliness knows and affirms that there is no fusion, no resolution of the i in something big, no we which removes the particularity and diversity of the i. and it feels death which wants to be learned, as not interchangeable task.

this loneliness can become powerful, and can create another sentiment of connectivity than the always failing fusion. in the domain of self it is the connection with this strange myself in feeling well. in the domain of society it is the connection with potentially all, as also lost splinters of this world, in a shared and appreciated existence.